Wednesday, September 8, 2010


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How do I end up in the same old place
Faced again with the same mistakes
So stubborn, thinking I know what is right
But life proves me wrong every time

Taking roads that lead me no where,
How do I expect to get there
But when will I learn to just put you first?

I come to you now when I need you,
But why do I wait to come see you
I always try to do this on my own
But I was wrong, cause only with you
Can I move on (can I move on)

When I am weak, it's you that makes me strong
And I know that you've been with me all along
So many times I forget to close my eyes
And listen to my heart
With you, life is so easy
Why do I make it hard

Oh, taking roads that lead me no where,
How do I expect to get there

When will I learn to just put you first?

I, I come to you now when I need you
But why do I wait to come see you
I always try to do this on my own
But I was wrong, cause only with you
Can I move on

I'll get out of my own way,
Let you have your way
Cause I realized I'm no good on my own
I'm there for you, I'll serve for you
I can't live without you

I come to you now when I need you
Why do I wait to come see you
I always try to do this on my own
But I was wrong, I was wrong, I was wrong,
With only you, only you, with only you
Can I move on, can I move on, can I move on

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is this photo from you yineng? who is it or is it from tumblr or something ..tumblr_l6tql7rz681qaixo6o1_500


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reminds me of the Korean animal cookies




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Sunday, September 5, 2010

Bec

This 80 year old man which a chest infection, osteoporosis and thus a hip replacement said to me at hospital "when you get to my age, you might get it too, but you have to get to my age first."

I don't expect to live to 80 lol.

But I feel like I'm ageing already - definitely feel different.. grown up and older - like prematurely ageing. I just get aches and pains and complain non-stop. I don't get my satisfying sleep anymore. Fuck I feel like my mum. Especially with the non-stop complaining and feeling sorry for myself. WTF I just feel so fustrated with everything I don't know why. I feel fustrated when shit's not going my way, when I can't work things out...

At hospital, I met 2 interns who were nice enough to joke around with us for 2 hours. They were Newcastle and Sydney Uni graduates. Both so confident. It was weird. They are where I'll be in 5 years and I can never see myself in their shoes. First year out of uni and the way they talk, the way they act, everything - It was just like they were fully pledged doctors lol... Even if they don't know everything, they pulled it off like they did.

I don't know I can't really explain it. But they were teaching my how to present a patient history to them. They full got out papers and were like writing down what I said and teaching me - so much passion ays.. lol. And in the background nurses were coming in and out asking them questions, asking them to fill out paper work etc

I'll tell you guys what happened.

We went to the nurses and asked for patients to interview - they told us bed 6 and bed 8. I interviewed the patient at bed 6, nice 76 year old man with MAC infection and asbestos exposure.. After that we were trying to find bed 8 (weird layout of that hospital ward) and the Sydney uni guy looks out the window of their room thing and is like

Interns: "you look lost - first years?"

Us: Trying to find bed 8

Intern: come in come in.. what are you guys looking for

Us: Patients to practise medical history taking

Intern: try bed 6 he's good to talk to

Us: Yeah we just got to him

Intern: Ohhh he's my patient. So. Tell me what's wrong with him.

And from there we just chatted for about an hour and presented the history. Then the Newcastle intern told us bed 8 was his patient and he full introed us to his pt "These are first year students - they know nothing - be gentle" haha.. so friendly.

Okay I'm getting off track but pretty much.. right now.. i just feel like I'm never going to get there...

The amount of sleep you need depends on many factors, especially your age. Infants typically sleep at least 16 hours a day. Most preschoolers need at least 11 hours of sleep a night, and most school-age children need at least 10 hours of sleep a night. By the teenage years, nine hours of sleep a night is usually adequate. For most adults, seven to eight hours a night seems about right.

I feel a preschooler ...

 
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